Go back a number of blogs and you will find the two motivations for everything we do – avoidance of pain and pursuit of pleasure. And recently we also discussed patterns. Well now what we want to do is identify the patterns (repetitive behaviors) that we have associated to our pains and pleasures.
I’ll give you some so you will know exactly what I mean, things that people do to avoid pain and get into pleasure, patterns you see everyday and everywhere, and remember it can be to avoid Mental, Emotional, Physical and/or Spiritual pains. Some very disempowering examples would be vaping, smoking, drinking, overeating, undereating, cutting, being abusive – verbally or physically, pornography, etc. some healthier avoidance of pain patterns and strategies are running, swimming, biking, walking, hiking, yoga, any other exercises, learning and self-help, bible studies, talking with friends and mentors, volunteering to help others, etc.
Identifying your patterns for avoiding pain and for pursuing pleasure are hugely important. And equally important is identifying why you do these patterns, what need do they satisfy? Certainty or comfort, variety, the need to be significant, or the need for love? Now notice this. People that want love will often do things to be significant. The comfort of certainty robs many of their dreams and visions. A constant pursuit of variety or uncertainty leaves one with no stability, maybe even a state of anxiety. Right now take a few minutes to notice your patterns and needs and then define 1 to 3 shifts you could make or do that would be healthier, more empowering for you.
